Chinese relations and the word foreigner

If we are to smooth the transition between Chinese and Western cultures, use of the word foreigner must be dropped from the lexicon.

As I talk more and more with China in business, academia and using skype and other modern communication tools, I am constantly reminded that I am a foreigner by Chinese, even in my own living room where I use my computer. I realize this is confucian philosophy up close and personal.

This strikes offense in me like a bolt of lighting. Here I am trying to freely exchange cultural similarities and get closer to another culture and they ignorantly use the term "foreigner" to characterize me. I think it is one of the first english words they learn as Chinese because it is thrown around the discussion like a blow job on the set of a cheap porn film.

What I think is necessary to not cause offence is to be referred to by nationality. It kills to birds with one stone in that it accurately describes where I am from as well an does not insult me at the same time. Something that is always needed in diplomatic relations with another culture.

The following dialoue is from a skype session I had with a woman from Shanghai the other day.

steve: 13:15:32
can you teach me some charaters...?

sunny: 13:17:47
it is difficult to a foreign, it is like english to me

steve: 13:18:19
I do not like the word foreigner...it is offensive to me.

sunny: 13:18:27
chinese is my mother language, but i don't know how to tell you....

steve: 13:20:59
There are many chinese speakers here in San Francisco...

steve: 13:21:10
They are not foreigners...

sunny: 13:21:33
oh

steve: 13:22:07
Do you understand how using the word foreigner make you appear to be less than friendly?

sunny: 13:23:32
no, in fact i don't undersand

steve: 13:26:21
when you use the term foreigner, you are saying to the person that they are not close to you. It tends to distance yourself from other people and prevents coming together closer to share more together....understand?

sunny: 13:27:17
yes, i know, thank you

sunny: 13:27:38
but which word i shoud use?

steve: 13:29:44
I try and use nationalistic terms when describing people. It flatters them instead of putting them in a one size fits all catagory of "foreigner" It shows you know the difference between French culture and Russian culture and it is perceived as a compliment to them.

sunny: 13:31:22
for example?

steve: 13:32:13
I will use your sentence...

steve: 13:33:21
it is difficult to a foreign, it is like english to me. or it is difficult for an american to learn chinese, it is like english to me.

steveallard: 13:38:21
does it make any sense to you?

steve: 13:44:44
did I condescend you sunny? ....I did not mean to condescend?

sunny: 13:48:51
no,it is only beacuse my english is not good

sunny: 13:49:32
if possible, i will learn from you...haha

steve: 13:49:40
On th econtrary, your english is quite good!

steve: 13:51:40
Many that I talk to here on skype from China use the term "foreigner" The reality is that we are both in our native coutries when chatting to one another. It is a bit strange when you think about it...

steve: 13:52:16
we will teach eachother... :)

sunny: 13:53:34
:)

Lao wei is the Romanization of the word foreigner in Mandarin.

Some other words to use in place of Lao wei or foreigner:

Korean
Russian
Japanese
Singaporean
Indian
Pakistanian
Iraqi
British
French
American
Canadian

the fundamental shift of the Chinese mind in recognizing another's nationality instead of placing them into the cauldron of "foreigner" is sure to smooth the way to better relations.

Blending culture one situatiuon at a time...this is the key to creating harmony and communication between foreign nations.


If you choose to be a ham fisted meathead and wear the label of foreigner, then you probably have these guys in your record collection.